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Ruin is a Gift

Are you marvelling at the wonders of life or do you find yourself going through the motions of the mundane? What do we do when life doesn't work out as planned?


This morning Clare led us on journey of reframing ruin and grief so that we might find healing from heartache and marvel once again.


Do you ever feel like life is passing you by? In this clip from Eat, Pray, Love, Elizabeth is looking for change.

Clare invites us to examine our unprocessed pain and ask how it might have affected our ability to marvel at life.

"What we think we know is just the beginning..."

As Elizabeth travels to Rome she finds a powerful metaphor for her own life's journey in some ancient ruins.

Clare invites us to engage with the statement "Ruin is a gift" and explains how we might each need to grieve different things in order to appreciate this gift.

"Out of the shadow, the morning is breaking and all is new."

Clare offers some practical applications for letting go of the past and how we can find the end of all drama in our life.

"When you live in complete acceptance of what is, that is the end of all drama in your life."

Clare closed with this great poem by Jeff Foster:


Once, I ran from fear so fear controlled me. Until I learned to hold fear like a newborn. Listen to it, but not give in. Honour it, but not worship it. Fear could not stop me anymore. I walked with courage into the storm. I still have fear, but it does not have me.

Once, I was ashamed of who I was. I invited shame into my heart. I let it burn. It told me, "I am only trying to protect your vulnerability". I thanked shame dearly, and stepped into life anyway, unashamed, with shame as a lover.

Once, I had great sadness buried deep inside. I invited it to come out and play. I wept oceans. My tear ducts ran dry. And I found joy right there. Right at the core of my sorrow. It was heartbreak that taught me how to love.

Once, I had anxiety. A mind that wouldn't stop. Thoughts that wouldn't be silent. So I stopped trying to silence them. And I dropped out of the mind, and into the Earth. Into the mud. Where I was held strong like a tree, unshakeable, safe.

Once, anger burned in the depths. I called anger into the light of myself. I felt its shocking power. I let my heart pound and my blood boil. Listened to it, finally. And it screamed, "Respect yourself fiercely now!". "Speak your truth with passion!". "Say no when you mean no!". "Walk your path with courage!". "Let no one speak for you!" Anger became an honest friend. A truthful guide. A beautiful wild child.

Once, loneliness cut deep. I tried to distract and numb myself. Ran to people and places and things. Even pretended I was "happy". But soon I could not run anymore. And I tumbled into the heart of loneliness. And I died and was reborn into an exquisite solitude and stillness. That connected me to all things. So I was not lonely, but alone with All Life. My heart One with all other hearts.

Once, I ran from difficult feelings. Now, they are my advisors, confidants, friends, and they all have a home in me, and they all belong and have dignity. I am sensitive, soft, fragile, my arms wrapped around all my inner children. And in my sensitivity, power. In my fragility, an unshakeable Presence.

In the depths of my wounds, in what I had named “darkness”, I found a blazing Light that guides me now in battle.

I became a warrior when I turned towards myself.

And started listening.

"The first step's the hardest when you're walking into the unknown..."

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